Today Tom and I watched a documentary called, Bigger, Stronger, Faster: The Side Effect of Being American. It's about steroid use in America. It was pretty interesting, but I think what I found most interesting was they way the individuals who used Steroids justified their use.
Several of them stated that everyone does it (in their field of athleticism), that they couldn't lift 800 pounds (GOD FORBID) if they didn't, you get a better workout while on them and the best one that so many of our heroes and world leaders "cheat" so why not?
I couldn't help but think where is the logic? Really? How can you justify putting an unnatural substance (not to mention illegal) into your body to look like this? This is Greg Valentino (he makes me want to vomit) his biceps are 27 inches -Hulk Hogan's were 24 inches in his hay day- and he (well they both did) uses Roids like they are going out of style.
I personally find this look appalling, and I don't know of a single person who finds this look appealing. Even more so the logic...I just don't get it.
Consider me stupefied.
*
On a completely different note I had a grounding moment today. I had to go into Boston today for an appointment. I out on my cute sleeveless black dress, wore a flower in my hair and just felt pretty good. As I was walking down the street feeling all confident about myself and just as I was thinking to myself Man, I feel good - I tripped. Yup. Over my own feet, in front of a bunch of strangers. When I collected myself I couldn't help but think That's what you get for feeling good about yourself. It just pissed me off.
*
Anyway, we are going to NYC to celebrate Keri turning 21 so I won't be back until Monday or Tuesday. My goal was to maintain, so I won't be eating garbage, but I am allowing myself some alcohol and some good NY food. I will let you know how it goes.
Shout out goes to Keri!!!! HAPPY 21!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Much love
-K
Friday, July 9, 2010
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Can I tell you something?
Today I had a friend contact me to talk about their weight. They had expressed feelings of sadness, anger and disgust.
Man, have I been there. When I got on the scale before I started this I felt pretty awful. But I can remember a time when I felt even worse about myself than I did a month ago.
When I went to college I gain the Freshman 30+...I was weighing in at over 190. Part of this was because I ate like a pig, and part of it was that I had no body awareness. I did not see my butt growing despite my increasing pant size.
I am SO glad that I opened my eyes.
But I remember when I came home freshman year (my sister had lost like 100 pounds -go you!) and I got on a scale for the first time in probably a year. YOWZA! I remember thinking that it was going to be impossible to lose the weight. I remember feeling depressed, angry and sad. That summer I lost almost 30 pounds.
I was dedicated to myself.
And it felt soooooooo good.
I remember going back to school and feeling confident, good and strong.
I want that feeling back. I want it back bad.
I want to dedicate myself to me.
Today's shout out goes to my friend who sent me that message today. I love you more than you know and please don't let this break you. You are a strong and AMAZING woman and I know you can do whatever is it that you set your mind to.
Quote of the day: Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork. ~English Proverb
What I ate today:
Fiber one cereal and milk
apple
orange
Pizza
Ice cream
Granola bar
Peppers and Broccoli
Chicken and rice
Watermelon
Begin P90x week three!
Woo!
-K
Man, have I been there. When I got on the scale before I started this I felt pretty awful. But I can remember a time when I felt even worse about myself than I did a month ago.
When I went to college I gain the Freshman 30+...I was weighing in at over 190. Part of this was because I ate like a pig, and part of it was that I had no body awareness. I did not see my butt growing despite my increasing pant size.
I am SO glad that I opened my eyes.
But I remember when I came home freshman year (my sister had lost like 100 pounds -go you!) and I got on a scale for the first time in probably a year. YOWZA! I remember thinking that it was going to be impossible to lose the weight. I remember feeling depressed, angry and sad. That summer I lost almost 30 pounds.
I was dedicated to myself.
And it felt soooooooo good.
I remember going back to school and feeling confident, good and strong.
I want that feeling back. I want it back bad.
I want to dedicate myself to me.
Today's shout out goes to my friend who sent me that message today. I love you more than you know and please don't let this break you. You are a strong and AMAZING woman and I know you can do whatever is it that you set your mind to.
Quote of the day: Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork. ~English Proverb
What I ate today:
Fiber one cereal and milk
apple
orange
Pizza
Ice cream
Granola bar
Peppers and Broccoli
Chicken and rice
Watermelon
Begin P90x week three!
Woo!
-K
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Warrior
A little over a month ago my horoscope read:
I liked this so much that I cut it out, laminated it and put it in my wallet. I had forgotten about it until I came across it today.
A warrior. That is what I want to be.
Unfortunately, I am my own worst enemy. I want to battle all of my unsuccessful habits. Take them down. I want to be successful at managing my weight. I want to be successful at looking good, even better- feeling good. I want to be the master of myself.
I knew going into this, it was going to be tough. I have a lot of unsuccessful habits. While I have become a little better at managing them, I have not taken them down. I have moments, hours and days of weakness. There are more times than I would like to admit that I want to give up, but something always grounds me and tells me to look ahead. Even on the days that I eat nothing but sugar.
In my near future, I can be that warrior. I want to be a warrior.
***
Quote of the day: A warrior lives by acting, not by thinking about acting, nor by thinking about what he will think when he has finished acting. - Carlos Castaneda
Kempo today was FUN!
What I ate:
Fiber one cereal with milk
Shake
Apple
Orange
Grilled cheese
100 calorie doritos
Lasagna
SALAD
A roll
Watermelon
Much love
-K
You must battle your own tendencies. If they are not habits that lead to success, take them down. Do this even when it's difficult. That's the mark of a warrior.
I liked this so much that I cut it out, laminated it and put it in my wallet. I had forgotten about it until I came across it today.
A warrior. That is what I want to be.
Unfortunately, I am my own worst enemy. I want to battle all of my unsuccessful habits. Take them down. I want to be successful at managing my weight. I want to be successful at looking good, even better- feeling good. I want to be the master of myself.
I knew going into this, it was going to be tough. I have a lot of unsuccessful habits. While I have become a little better at managing them, I have not taken them down. I have moments, hours and days of weakness. There are more times than I would like to admit that I want to give up, but something always grounds me and tells me to look ahead. Even on the days that I eat nothing but sugar.
In my near future, I can be that warrior. I want to be a warrior.
***
Quote of the day: A warrior lives by acting, not by thinking about acting, nor by thinking about what he will think when he has finished acting. - Carlos Castaneda
Kempo today was FUN!
What I ate:
Fiber one cereal with milk
Shake
Apple
Orange
Grilled cheese
100 calorie doritos
Lasagna
SALAD
A roll
Watermelon
Much love
-K
Monday, July 5, 2010
Kool and the Gang said it best...
Today was one of the best days I have had in a while. I got to spend the day with two of my very best friends, who are very conscious of my own health, and just veg out.
Despite the good times had today I woke up in a funk. One of those "uhg, do I have to get out of bed today" kind of funks.
I blame the heat.
Something about these 95 degree days that just makes me feel blech.
This whole week is going to be hot, so I gotta find a way to endure it and all its tempting bad habits that can come from heat. Like: Ice cream, not exercising (both of which happened today) eating junk food.
Shout out today goes to my 2 lady friends for being aware of my changes and not encouraging bad choices, thanks!
Quote of the day: CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!
What I ate today:
Cheerios
Milk
Apples
Bruchetta Sandwich
Fruit Salad
Chex Mix
Small Chocolate Ice Cream
Grilled Cheese
Grapes
So not the best, but considering my past, could have been a lot worse.
Bring on the heat!
-K
Despite the good times had today I woke up in a funk. One of those "uhg, do I have to get out of bed today" kind of funks.
I blame the heat.
Something about these 95 degree days that just makes me feel blech.
This whole week is going to be hot, so I gotta find a way to endure it and all its tempting bad habits that can come from heat. Like: Ice cream, not exercising (both of which happened today) eating junk food.
Shout out today goes to my 2 lady friends for being aware of my changes and not encouraging bad choices, thanks!
Quote of the day: CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!
What I ate today:
Cheerios
Milk
Apples
Bruchetta Sandwich
Fruit Salad
Chex Mix
Small Chocolate Ice Cream
Grilled Cheese
Grapes
So not the best, but considering my past, could have been a lot worse.
Bring on the heat!
-K
Sunday, July 4, 2010
All you can eat
Happy 4th of July!
Today I celebrated. I told myself that I would eat well, but what I wanted to eat. I feel okay about it too.
Today I ate cheerios with milk, half a delicious turkey burger and a hot dog, some chips, potato salad, salad, corn on the cob, some cake, coffee, a handful of coconut m&m's, watermelon and some grapes. While I did not "eat well" I kept track of it all.
My plan for this week is to maintain. I have a 21st birthday to celebrate this weekend, and realistically, I know that to think I can lose would not make me feel good when I don't next Sunday.
Today was weigh in day: 163 (by some act of God I lost a pound) down 7 pounds.
It was also Yoga day. Phew.
Back on course tomorrow!
Shout out to America!
Quote of the day: There is more to life than increasing its speed. ~Mohandas K. Gandhi
Love!
-K
Today I celebrated. I told myself that I would eat well, but what I wanted to eat. I feel okay about it too.
Today I ate cheerios with milk, half a delicious turkey burger and a hot dog, some chips, potato salad, salad, corn on the cob, some cake, coffee, a handful of coconut m&m's, watermelon and some grapes. While I did not "eat well" I kept track of it all.
My plan for this week is to maintain. I have a 21st birthday to celebrate this weekend, and realistically, I know that to think I can lose would not make me feel good when I don't next Sunday.
Today was weigh in day: 163 (by some act of God I lost a pound) down 7 pounds.
It was also Yoga day. Phew.
Back on course tomorrow!
Shout out to America!
Quote of the day: There is more to life than increasing its speed. ~Mohandas K. Gandhi
Love!
-K
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Frustration
I have been pretty frustrated with myself the last few days.
As per usual, I have been lackadaisical with the tracking of my food. This is a skill,for some reason, I just can not get myself into. I think part of me is resistant to tracking because I don't want to have to track for the rest of my life, but then again, I will never master my food intake if I am not conscious of it.
I have definitely been making much better food choices since I began this change, but I know that I can do better.
This week (as predicted) has been challenging. I have had many out of the house food challenges and cravings up the wazoo. AND I still have three parties to attend. BUT I am taking this as an opportunity (and not a challenge) to make good/better choices, to keep track of everything and to be on my game.
I am pretty frustrated with myself this week. But I don't want this to be the thing that will make me sabotage myself. In the words of ADIDAS I need to "Just do it" because -really- the only person I am letting down is myself.
A friend of mine e-mailed me yesterday asking how I keep track of my food. Usually I write it down at night. But I also carry a mini notebook to write down all my food choices throughout the day. This week that fell by the wayside, but starting today I will get back on track (ha).
Sparkpeople also has a free food tracker (you can download it to your smart phone) which keeps track of calories, fiber, protein, fat and sodium (among other things if you choose to track them). This seems to be pretty helpful as well.
*
I am writing early today because we have a party to go to at 1. And since I am not cooking I can not say what I will eat today, but I am promising this: I will make good choices. I will eat the fruit (that I am bringing) and the veggies, I will eat a turkey burger instead of beef (or a hot dog for that matter - unless they are 97% fat free) and I am staying away from alcohol. Plus when its 95 degrees outside, who wants to drink anything other than water?
I did my workout this morning. Arms and shoulders (thank you Tony).
*
For the inquiring minds (and I appreciate the urges)- I did not blog yesterday because it was one of those no time, got a million and ten things to do, emergency work call, got home late - kind of days. I did not make the best food choices because I was "gone" from 8am to about 1030pm. But this is why I like new days. I get to start over.
*
Quote of the day: “Even though you are on the right track - you will get run over if you just sit there” -unknown
Shout out to Dori. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!! and thanks for all the support you have given me!
Love
-K
As per usual, I have been lackadaisical with the tracking of my food. This is a skill,for some reason, I just can not get myself into. I think part of me is resistant to tracking because I don't want to have to track for the rest of my life, but then again, I will never master my food intake if I am not conscious of it.
I have definitely been making much better food choices since I began this change, but I know that I can do better.
This week (as predicted) has been challenging. I have had many out of the house food challenges and cravings up the wazoo. AND I still have three parties to attend. BUT I am taking this as an opportunity (and not a challenge) to make good/better choices, to keep track of everything and to be on my game.
I am pretty frustrated with myself this week. But I don't want this to be the thing that will make me sabotage myself. In the words of ADIDAS I need to "Just do it" because -really- the only person I am letting down is myself.
A friend of mine e-mailed me yesterday asking how I keep track of my food. Usually I write it down at night. But I also carry a mini notebook to write down all my food choices throughout the day. This week that fell by the wayside, but starting today I will get back on track (ha).
Sparkpeople also has a free food tracker (you can download it to your smart phone) which keeps track of calories, fiber, protein, fat and sodium (among other things if you choose to track them). This seems to be pretty helpful as well.
*
I am writing early today because we have a party to go to at 1. And since I am not cooking I can not say what I will eat today, but I am promising this: I will make good choices. I will eat the fruit (that I am bringing) and the veggies, I will eat a turkey burger instead of beef (or a hot dog for that matter - unless they are 97% fat free) and I am staying away from alcohol. Plus when its 95 degrees outside, who wants to drink anything other than water?
I did my workout this morning. Arms and shoulders (thank you Tony).
*
For the inquiring minds (and I appreciate the urges)- I did not blog yesterday because it was one of those no time, got a million and ten things to do, emergency work call, got home late - kind of days. I did not make the best food choices because I was "gone" from 8am to about 1030pm. But this is why I like new days. I get to start over.
*
Quote of the day: “Even though you are on the right track - you will get run over if you just sit there” -unknown
Shout out to Dori. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!! and thanks for all the support you have given me!
Love
-K
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Mmm Pizza
Today was a fun day.
Got my hair did. Got a glue gun. Saw a friend. Ate some Pizza.
Knowing that I wanted some delicious Pizza I saved some room for it.
One of the best things about my friends is their willingness to listen to all my issues and support all my new habits. For that I love you guys.
Since I am using a borrowed computer, and about to watch the Mr. Fox movie today will be short.
What I ate today:
Protein Shake
Cantaloupe
100 Calorie Bagel
Turkey Sandwich
Carrots
Orange
Salad
Pizza
A few bites of some chocolate cake
Diet Pepsi
Yum!
-K
Got my hair did. Got a glue gun. Saw a friend. Ate some Pizza.
Knowing that I wanted some delicious Pizza I saved some room for it.
One of the best things about my friends is their willingness to listen to all my issues and support all my new habits. For that I love you guys.
Since I am using a borrowed computer, and about to watch the Mr. Fox movie today will be short.
What I ate today:
Protein Shake
Cantaloupe
100 Calorie Bagel
Turkey Sandwich
Carrots
Orange
Salad
Pizza
A few bites of some chocolate cake
Diet Pepsi
Yum!
-K
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