Since I have started this blog I have received several e-mails, texts, phone calls etc. from friends and family and even people I do not have a "relationship" with telling me how inspired they have been by reading my blog.
I can not even begin to express how amazing and awesome and -being honest- ego-boosting it is to get that kind of feedback.
I have also had people talk to me about their own struggles with their weight, food relationships, and body image...before this blog, I don't think those conversations would have taken place.
However, with all the positive support and amazing conversations I have had due to this blog, I have had some un-supportive people "offer" negative and sabotaging feedback/comments. As well as I can handle constructive feedback and even manage hurtful words...there are times that the negativity gets to me and is difficult to manage. Especially when it comes from people who I thought would understand this whole journey (and oddly it has only come from people who I am closer to).
I do not write with hostility or anger. I write with a request.
Today I am asking those people who can not, for whatever reason, be supportive of me and the changes I am trying very hard to make to back off.
I do not judge you and your food decisions, your weight, or how you feel about yourself. I certainly do not put you down or sabotage your progress.
If you can not support me then keep your negativity to yourself.
I do not need your negativity seeping into the crevices that I am working very hard to seal with positivity.
I am not perfect, I have bad days and even bad weeks (this one not being an exception) but I love all the wonderful support and love I have received. The recipes, the suggestions, the questions and the support have helped me SO much and are a huge part of the reason that I have been this successful so far. The negativity, while it will not stop me, slows me down - so leave it in your own brain.
Several "challenges" to better your self esteem is to compliment others. Being nice/helpful to others often makes you feel better about yourself. Try it sometime.
Many thanks to all my wonderful friends and family for keeping me grounded, for giving me motivation, and supporting me. I am so grateful and I love you.
*
Anyway, this week has been rough for me. I have not slept well, I have been obnoxiously busy, and I am pretty sure mother nature has had something against me the past few days. Add this all up and it equals some poor choices and a not so great attitude (apologies to Tom for having to live with that). I will get back on track and I will be fine I just can't wait for this week to be over. Luckily it almost is. Phew.
Also...
To all my loves who have complained about my lack of attention to the blog (thank you for the push, its been needed this week) I am going to NYC to see my sisters -as it is often a rare occasion that we are all together- which means that I will probably be MIA for a few days.
Lots-o-love
-K
Kate,
ReplyDeleteRemember you are doing this for yourself, as that is the only way you will be successful, so don't let anyone's negative comments bother you. They are the ones with the problem,not you. I am very proud of what you are doing here, it helps me on my quest to loose weight and become healthier. If all else fails tell me who these negative people are and I will have a "nice" chat with them.
See you later.
Love, MoM
Anyone messes with my wifey, I'll shank 'em. Just tell me who. Unemployment has given me ample opportunity to watch a TON of prison shows. I know how to make things happen.
ReplyDeleteAnd listen to your mother.
Isn't it unfortunate that the people who are supposed to love and support you the most are often the ones who end up doing things like that? It seems like such a common problem. I know it doesn't just happen with diets but also with other aspects of a person's life. I imagine that sometimes people make negative comments like that either out of jealousy or, maybe in your case with your weight loss efforts, because they associate their time with you as one that revolved around unhealthy food choices and they think that your relationship with them will somehow change because your relationship with food has changed. I feel very lucky that Gordon has been supportive of my efforts to change my habits but sometimes I still need to give him a little reminder that, while I can indulge in moderation, I can't generally be eating and drinking the way I did before. That's how I got to be so overweight in the first place! I think it can be especially difficult for a person who's never struggled with their weight to understand what a tough process it is. I also imagine there is a certain element of people who have much more to lose than you do and think to themselves, "What's this girl complaining about? I've got 50 pounds on her," instead of looking at you as an inspiration to nip things in the bud before they got out of hand and you had 50 or more pounds to deal with instead of about 20. So, again, there might be a bit of jealousy at play and jealousy can make people say awful things sometimes, even to people you love.
ReplyDeleteIt's unfortunate that some people are so negative while your blog is so positive. Just keep doing what you're doing-you have to know that reading this blog is a great part of my day, and it really makes me feel like we're keeping in touch (since I left facebook I really am out of the loop). I promise not to bug you about blogging this weekend-enjoy the sister time and NYC and come back with stories to share :) Love you!
ReplyDelete